Oh HALLIEBETH87 , I know the struggle of trying different meds and it seems nothing will ever work. It may not take it all away, but there is hope out there. Maybe try not fighting against the emotions you feel so hard, sometimes it is good just to cry and let yourself feel the moment (as long as you are no danger to yourself). It helps me to "allow" myself to be as I am and not judge it. I guess what I am trying to get at is acceptance from yourself. When you feel this way, there seems to be nothing that can take it away, that it will never end. Remember, even the worst of storms pass. Be kind to yourself and please take care.