I saw this post after googling "i feel like my life is over" in the early hours of the morning. I know things have gotten bad when I am seeing out anonymous help from free shrinks I have access to for a very limited time, or forums like this. Yet, I feel like I have no other avenue at this point.

I have no idea what category this belongs in, but I generally identified with the original posters sentiment. The most recent reason for me feeling in this state is the failure of my relationship with the only real woman I've ever loved. I am recently a 29 year old, and the lady in question is 30.

We met online, living on opposite sides of the country about 3-3.5 years ago. We fell in love hard and stayed connected on the phone until she packed what she had in her beat up car and came to live with me in my tiny apartment along with my friendly but incompetent roommate.

Things went sour after about 6-12 months after we had agreed that she didn't want me to work, and she was going to try and move up at her job, which slowly, she has, to her credit. Our living situation took its toll however, and as of late she has rekindled some long lost affections with an old high school friend who lives in the state she moved from. This obviously has caused us issues. At this point she loves me, and likely always will but doesn't feel she is likely right for me, and hasn't been happy for awhile.

This woman came into my life after years of intense depression and suffering and was a breathe of fresh air. I have not loved, and nor will I likely ever love someone the way I have her, and for her, I suspect it is the same, she certainly has said as much. This entire thing has been crushing my soul and continues to do so. She is getting ready to move out about 15 mins from me with relatives.

I have never been able to keep down a job, and that was even when things weren't as bad as they are now, and likely will continue to be for most folks going forward. The reality is, this system is rigged, and our planet is going to the ******* with fewer and fewer jobs, ecological and material resources, and an ever increasing population looking for meaning, and a means of survival.

The reality of, well, reality, has essentially just made me want to end it. I do, in fact, want to live, but not like this. The cold hard reality is, this all may just be entirely pointless, and we are just biological beings destined to die and that's about it. But it's entirely possible things are more sophisticated then that. I am open to that much at least.

None the less, I am finding it hard to continue.