I am embarrassed to admit this ... one of my earliest memories is my parents finding out that I was masturbating to orgasm (though I had no idea) and them telling me that I couldn't do that. Based on where I was in my memory, I was around 3 years old. I continued to do it in secret virtually every night as I fell asleep and other times when I felt uncomfortable as a way to cope. And - weirdest of all - I can remember doing it at my desk in elementary school and thinking nobody could tell. And nobody ever said word one about it to me so maybe they really couldn't tell.

I am so embarrassed about it that I've never told anyone about it and I avoid conversations about childhood with anyone I grew up with because I'm afraid that they'll say something that will clue me in to the fact that they knew about it. I had a friend who told me a couple years ago that I used to "bounce" in the bed when we'd have sleepovers.

I can't believe I just admitted that. Someone tell me I'm not a freak. lol

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk