gentle heart for children? Seeing my granddaughter again for the first time after the "birthday cake incident" is really bothering me! I don't want to see her!

Edit: I realize I didn't give much information now...

Almost a year and a half ago, my granddaughter, the Light of my Life (back then) asked me to make her a Barbie Cake, which I did. The day of her birthday party arrived and so did I with the Barbie cake. She met me at our RV and pretty much dismissed my cake saying that her grandma had made her one. I reacted which I shouldn't have but I didn't do what she accused me of. She told her parents that I had said words to her that she wasn't allowed to repeat and I had also said that "I hate you and I never want you to come to my house ever again!!" She was believed by all and as a consequence I haven't been able to see her for the past year and a half. I haven't been able to see my grandsons, either.

After working things out with my DIL, I finally am able to see the kids Saturday at the two oldest's T-ball/baseball games. I'm dying to see the boys but it really hurts to have to see Autumn again face to face.

The plan is for me to just sit on the sidelines and watch the game but I will not be approaching her in any way. You see, her parents told her that she doesn't have to talk to me if she doesn't want to. I don't agree but maybe it's a good thing. I might not want to talk to her, either.

There's a whole bunch of feelings I have but don't have the first clue how to deal with, except... to keep my mouth shut. That's one of the "Boundaries" that got set for my by my DIL.

Help?