I understand what your T was getting at, but the choice of words were not the best way to present it. Mine said to me once, when I was having issues with my husband, "look we can talk all the time about all the things your H does, but that's not going to help you. We have to look at how you want to address this and how you want to change it. Because you know he's not going to change."
I think this gets a similar point across without without using the term "self righteous indignation", which sounds judgemental and would put most people on the defensive. You could address it with your T this way, that it was the choice of words that you didn't appreciate, not that she was not hearing you.