It sounds to me like your husband is really struggling with something or maybe many things. It could be anything really and honestly he is the only one who can figure it out. And chances are he doesn't even know what it is.

If you really want to try to work things out you need to do counseling or at least find a way to work with him on communication. It took me a long time to get to a point where I could effectively communicate to my husband what I needed/wanted. We are so very different in our communication needs. There are a few good books and articles out there about communication styles and how to effectively communicate with the different types.

Once there is a line of communication you can start working on what he wants and you want out of your relationship. The biggest thing I learned was my husband isn't a mind reader. Seems obvious right, nope. I had to think of all of the times when I would say, "He should have known_____." The thing is, he didn't know. His brain doesn't work like mine and he can't read what I am thinking.

Anyway, not sure any of that helped. But if you are wanting to stay in this relationship and if he wants to stay in the relationship I would suggest that you actively work on things. No excuses. If he isn't willing to put in the extra effort then it's over.

Good luck!