I'm sorry that I didn't reply to these sooner, was at work and for obvious reasons I have to be a little bit careful with personal use of the computer.
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Originally Posted by paynful
Sometimes you can make a difference... sometimes it won't matter what you do. I would try to offer some sort of comfort, (since I have no tangible advice) but all that comes to mind are literary quotes that seem... not enough right now.
Do what you can, keep fighting, thank your wife for her support, but... remember... come what may. You have lived through it before, you can do it again.
However, what seems to be your true concern is what awaits you on the other side... it only matters if you don't think you can fix anything what might break. I wouldn't worry about those "things" that haven't happened yet. There will be time enough for that later. Focus on what is in front of you. That is what you can effect.
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That was a insightful and well written post, thank you!
I do have an issue with control (perfectionism) and you're right... sometimes I do get a little wrapped up in the what if's rather than dealing with the here and now... by product of my upbringing I guess
Thanks again for the down to earth approach... it's handy to try real myself in on practical terms.
Quote:
Originally Posted by sophiesmom
If I understand correctly......You are speaking of prioritizing.
IF so, then I am able to do that at times.
I see depression as having a standard....once I am below my own standard, nothing else in my life matters. It requires outside intervention to be bought back up again.
If my depression is above my standard....then at that point it has it's ups and downs. And when it gets like that I have the ability to prioritize and I do so.....
For example if one of my kids were to go to the hospital, my depression would go on the back burner--it would move down as far as importance goes.
Which makes one think that you should be able to "be happy" by keeping busy. But it doesn't work that way because emotions are not involved in keeping busy.
Make any sense?....I tend to not communicate well...
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No, that was communicated well... thanks. This is kinda what I meant, though I wasn't articulate enough to specify in that direction.
Indulgence was really the wrong word to use so... meh lol.
Your analogy of standards is something I hadn't really thought of before... but I think it hits the nail on the head.
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Independent Mental Health Advocate (IMHA): UK