If you can't manage taking control for yourself, then you need to have a larger support system than just your fiancee - including seeing what health care services you would be eligble for.

If you feel like you have no freedom because you can't do things without difficulty (totally a fair thought), then can't you see how it might make your fiancee feel like she has no freedom if she has to do everything (or nearly everything) for you without even being asked?

I don't see how it's crazy that she got her money first - she went and set up her account and I think you said that she has told you she didn't know you wanted one or that you said you didn't want one. You reached difficulties getting your money because your dad is on the account or something as a payee - you would have ran into the very same difficulty if your fiancee had been there with you. The person you needed with you was your dad, not your fiancee.

I'll restate this though: if you can't figure things out on your own, you need to seek assistance outside of your fiancee. She cannot act as a personal support worker for you, but that is what it sounds like you want from her. She is your partner, not your worker. Just as you are her partner, not her job.

It isn't fair to be angry at her. She cannot read your mind and she cannot automatically know what you want help with. Yes, it would have been lovely if she had guessed that you wanted to do the same thing she was doing and if she had offered to help you. But even if she had - you would have still faced the same delay because you needed your dad as he was set up as the payee (or whatever it was).

Do you qualify for any programs to help with your disability? Is there any chance that you qualify for some form of personal support worker? If you don't know the answer, then I would recommend you try asking your doctor. It does sound like you need help at least getting yourself started, but that responsibility doesn't fall on your fiancee's shoulders.

Again - I really am trying to help you, but I am having a very hard time understanding a lot of what problems you're facing because you didn't answer my questions. It's ok if you don't want to answer my questions, but I can't help you or understand anymore. You've mostly just repeated the same few things that you have already said.