Quote:
Originally Posted by Toneo
I don't know what to do to cope. I find myself almost always alone. I know I have some friends, not many that I am very close too. I often experience a detachment with others, in other words no real valued connection as I appear to not be concerned with their well-being enough to make an effort to stay in contact. Sometimes, I am severely depressed or in an emotionless day dream state. In some cases when I have been around friends, especially old time friends, I've felt suddenly out of place like I have lost my conversational skills. There are times when I have been elated to be in the presence of friends, however as soon as I am alone again the depression sets in multiplying. I do not have a healthy balance of companionship I am mostly introverted. I feel alone experiencing a deep desire to socialize, but I am too timid and lack the energy.
Working long hours help me cope in the past but it is losing it's usefulness.
Other than work I probably socialize well with a friend someone once every month or two months. I used to like being alone. I feel helpless and pathetic.
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I struggle with the same things. I'm glad that you can still be sociable at work. I know it doesn't seem like much, but I would consider it a "win."
About your friends... Do they know that you are struggling with depression? Would you be comfortable sharing with, at least, your closest friends?
While it might not solve all of your issues with them, I have found that divulging my problems helps people understand. In the past, once I've explained that it wasn't a line... it really is me and not them (the people that are worth my time) stick around. I would explain that I really do care and miss them, but I'm really not up to our usual outings ...or even reacting as I normally would (I tend to have a very bleak/flat affect, having trouble expressing myself). After I explain this, they tend to be supportive by suggesting more low key outings, or even, spending evenings in. It isn't easy being my friend, but the people I let closest to me tend to see the value in me long-term.
When I posed a similar question on this forum (asking how to break out of my shell), I got very helpful suggestions like:
-volunteering at an animal shelter or the library
-meetup.com (a site to help find people with similar interests that are local to you)
-part-time work
-joining or starting a book club (I'm kind of a book worm)
-Yoga class
I hope I have been helpful
Feel free to PM or keep venting here on PC. It's helpful to me to hear from people with similar plights.