It really sucks that you have to deal with this. In my experience most people don't know how to respond because they do not have a frame of reference. My husband and I have been married for 5 years and he is only recently been able to wrap his mind around what is going on in my head. He loves me dearly but it is just so outside his experience that he did not know how to help.

What helped was me talking him through my emotions, and teaching him the difference between when the depression is talking and whe. i am talking. He loves comics and games so I found him some web comics and online games that would show him what it was like for someone experiencing depression.

In this case it worked. He is my biggest support and advocate and can even tell when I am going to spiral before I can sometimes. I am very lucky.

On the other hand I have also lost people due to this illness. Depression is a lot to take on and our societies understanding of mental illness is not what it ought to be.

In the end it is up to you. Do you want to try and reach out, or is it time to let her go? There is no wrong answer here. It is simply about what you can and cannot do at this particular point in time.

Hope this helps