Good morning,

"Whenever i got upset last time, I could just work it out with some exercise and I would feel better. But this time, whenever I get stressed out about something, I IMMEDIATELY think of killing myself because I feel like nobody cares anymore and I'm just so tired of the stress. It only happens when I'm in very upsetting situations. Otherwise I'm fine. The killing myself emotion comes on very suddenly, and I'm afraid one day I might actually get tired of crying my heart out and actually lose my life."

the first time I thought about killing myself, I was 6 or 7. I always believed if things got too bad I had a fallback plan. I now refer to it a my default setting. The last pdoc I saw, I asked him if that would always remain. He looked at me over the top of his glasses and responded...."yes".

There is an old saying.......we are not responsible for thoughts that come into our mind, but we are responsible if we let them build a nest. The fact that you can recognize it gives you the chance to process why you feel that way and then develop strategies to work through it faster. Acknowledge the feelings and find alternative steps.

Regards,

Sabra