I'm more like GrowlyCat; T says I have an on/off switch that when clicked, I pretty much instantly shut down but we never know what the "trigger" is.

I've become more aware when I do it because she's made a point to make me aware of it. She'll ask, often many times in one session, "Are you shutting down?" It helped that she created a detailed space (look, feel, size, etc.) for where I go when I shut down - it allowed me to communicate most of the time if I was "in that space" or still present in the room (or in between).

She's said I've tried to push her away financially (i'm on a sliding scale and we debated because I wanted to pay more); she says i "test" her; and I know this past week when I cancelled it was me pushing her away.