I really need some advice on how to control triggering thoughts and how to overcome anorexia. I promised my friend that I would try going 40 days without starving myself. I have to eat 3 times a day and eat properly portioned food. I didn't realize what I was getting myself into until this morning. On the way to work, I was almost in tears because I realized that I would have to eat today when I usually fast from Thursday until Sunday. All day I had thoughts of how I could get around this promise by eating as little as I could while still meeting the guidelines she set out for me. I know its to help me get better, but I don't want to do it anymore. On the other hand, I know I have to get better because I don't want to wind up living my life going in and out of hospitals, and going through treatments to help me get better. I just don't want to get back to the weight or size I used to be/: