6 yrs ago I saw my college counselor weekly (she was NOT a T). I often "test" people due to insecurities in order to be reassured. My counselor quickly caught on to when I was "testing" her. She started to call me out on it: "You're testing me again. Either you knock it off and tell me what you need or you can leave and come back when you're done testing me". It was very harsh and was difficult to accept. But it did teach me to recognize when I am "testing".
I now inform my current T when I'm "testing" her. She thinks it's hilarious because telling her defeats the purpose of "testing". But my insecurities still win over logic.
On top of "testing", I also have an on/off switch when "triggered". My T automatically knows because I just stop everything: talking, eye contact, being logical, etc. My T stops right away and tries to get me back. She's pretty good at getting me back...my fiance on the other hand sucks at it.
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"Odium became your opium..." ~Epica
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