I'm careful not to write ppl off as abusive impulsively. He clearly has some abandonment issues of his own that manifest as him threatening to leave her. I don't know him but since he's stopped speaking about the other woman I'm going to assume he realized he was wrong. In my opinion he likely rebounded with the OP from a hurtful relationship and then began hurting her. Hurting people hurt ppl.

I don't think he gave the OP mental problems, he likely aggravated the ones she had already which may be why she was willing to accept his mistreatment. In couples therapy a good therapist will provide a place to work things out or leave the relationship safely if necessary. I would never suggest that a woman or man learn to tolerate abuse. I recommended a safe place for her to work on the relationship and/or leave it.

It's too easy to advise a person to leave a relationship. When ppl reach the point of seeking help on a forum online, they likely want a few steps they can take. Leaving has likely already crossed their mind and led to them to reach out.

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