I have times where for whatever reasons I'm so consumed with rage I have thoughts of shooting, stabbing or beating someone to death. I know these are just thoughts but sometimes the urges feel incredibly intense. I know if I were to ever act on them my life would be effectively over but I find it very hard to control at times. Suppressing this rage isn't good for my health and sometimes I feel like I'm ticking timebomb. I'm almost hoping someone will want to start or pick a fight with me as an excuse to lash out.