So my ad/ap no longer allows me to indulge in my eating disorder in episode. For some reason since I have an intense desire to self harm on top of my suit thoughts. I have never ever sh while depressed until this episode. I do SH when delusional or manic. T's already assessed me for sui risk and probably will Monday too. I can't really talk to anyone irl because everyone is so happy the med took away ED but this is so much worse of a side effect. I'm so scared T is going to have me IP because of this. Meds are suppose to help!!! Any advice? I feel like I was better w/o meds. I don't need lasting physical repercutions on my skin from BP.