Hi Rose, One thing that was pretty interesting was in the chapter on “social arts.” Goleman writes about the transfer of emotions. Emotions are contagious. When someone emits a strong positive emotion, we tend to adapt that emotion. The quality to transmit emotions is necessary in many occupations. A good car salesman will exude positiveness about a vehicle he is trying to sell, even without getting deep into the details about the car itself, and that emotion will often transfer to the buyer. Teachers who show enthusiasm in the subject they are teaching are effective in motivating students, but even more so if she can form an emotional bond with the students.

It’s not showing your emotions that is important; it’s the ability to transfer those emotions to others in a way that the other person will want to share those emotions. It’s a quality often found in great leaders and motivators. Take Martin Luther King, for example. He was able to connect with thousands of people while giving a speech. Senator Barack Obama seems to have that quality while Senator Hillary Clinton may be lacking in it. Even though both presidential candidates may have good ideas, the one who can establish the best rapport with the voters will probably be the democratic nominee.

Goleman calls this sharing of emotions synchrony. It involves not only the sending but also the receiving of and empathy for the emotions of others. People who are weak in sending or receiving emotions are often prone to problems in relationships. They can make people feel uncomfortable because they don’t develop any type of rapport with the other person.

People who were abused or neglected as children may lack synchrony in emotions. They didn’t develop a healthy bond with a parent and didn’t learn the healthy way to share emotions. Those who suffer from emotional problems are often overly emotional -- possibly out of frustration from not being able to connect with other people.