Update-

After posting this, I started doing some research. I found that a considerable number of people (yes, women too!) have the same issue of not being able to climax while in bed with a partner, but can do so in no time while watching porn. Because they only masturbate to porn, their brains need that super intense stimulus to reach climax... which isn't the case when in bed with a partner. Most issues will clear up (supposedly) in a couple months if the person stops masturbating to porn. Women can also be desensitized to partner when using vibrators to masturbate.

So I talked to him. When I said confronted before, it was maybe not the right word... I am not aggressive, I just hate having skeletons and resentments and am willing to talk about anything, even if it's an embarrassing subject. He did get a little embarrassed (masturbation, he told me, had always been a very shameful thing for him... he was raised in a very religious home, go figure), but talked to me openly, if not shyly.

I asked him if he could put away the porn and I my vibrator for a 3 month period... just to see if it did anything to our sex life. I am in no way saying no masturbation; I think that is part of a healthy life. Just no props Au natural, if you will. I also told him that I would be more active in initiating (I am very terrible in that department... Always been a little self-conscious and very body conscious right now.

Right after the conversation, he was a little shy... he was processing, I think. About an hour later, we were flirting more than we have in months. He also kept touching me (pushing my hair behind my ear, holding my hand more than usual, standing really close while I was cooking). It felt awesome. Yesterday was day #2 and that same thing... very flirty all day, trying to make me laugh (and succeeding!), touching me constantly.

We will see how this goes in the long run, but with the current success rate, I don't think I need to cross my fingers!