Quote:
Originally Posted by Marshellette
I think we only get one chance. Because if you like someone, there is always someone you like just a fraction of a bit more. Someone who is what you want. I lost the love of my life at Christmas this year. We had been together three years. I still cry and feel so sad it feels as if someone has kicked me in the stomach. I tried to replicate it with someone else but I didn't feel much for him. However, he is comforting to me, this second person and five years younger. I am 27, (he is 22) aaah! Getting comfort from little boys a bad idea? This 22 year old and me, we pretty much sit around in his grungy apartment, he smokes pot and we listen to music and ****. It's simple, it's easy. It might be mechanical on my part but it takes the pain away...
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I don't think this has anything to do with having only one chance. The way you put it, "I tried to replicate it..." sounds way too much like you're trying to make something happen and unfortunately it so does not work that way. After a major break up you need time to work on yourself, grow and learn and become independent again, you need to be content in YOU first and in time something will happen with someone again. We don't get only one chance, I do not believe that but i believe many people try too hard too fast.
I was with my ex for 13+ years, married, had kids.. but I did not love her. When we split, the fact is it took me even 2 years to get on my feet myself. I didn't love her, how much more difficult for someone like you who did love their partner?
Also, really? 5 years? He's not a little boy and you're not old. I personally don't find age to be an issue at all in relationships but even if so in your case that's not even a large gap. So I wouldn't worry about that issue at all.