I don't think you addressed it as thoroughly as you need to because I don't think you were clear with your T about the immediacy of your need. I never saw you post that he refused to discuss the topic, just that he didn't think it was necessary at this time.

My concerns are the degree to which your old T's behavior is aberrant, and the intensity of your perception of your need for her. I hope your T can dissuade you from the path you're on.