Awe, Sweepy, I'm sorry. I always find it the same- as hard as it is to disclose, my struggle to cope after is much harder. After a while of living that hellish cycle of trauma work, I demanded more coping tools from my therapist. The DBT stuff helps me: planning pleasurable distractions post-session, taking extra good care of myself, accepting that my feelings are difficult but not harmful, and sometimes writing it out or expressing my feelings in a way that helps me at least partly release/defuse them. Learning relaxation techniques is also supposed to be really helpful, though I haven't gotten far with them yet. I hope you two will talk about a care plan for dealing with your disclosures: we deserve them! I don't think it can be easy, but it can get easier.