Quote:
Originally Posted by Asiablue
There's a difference between firm boundaries and rigid boundaries. Your current T has rigid boundaries and that's not anymore healthy than weak boundaries.
I actually don't think you have a massive problem with boundaries, hypersensitive about them yes but not completely unable to understand them or constantly challenging them. To me contacting a T out of session isn't a boundary breach. It's information. It should tell a T that you are overwhelmed, that you are in need of something and that she needs to find out what that something is.
|
Fair enough.
What I need is a T who understands that I have issues with trust, that I'm going to push and pull and get angry and say stupid stuff and withdraw and cling and test them and all this other stuff, and be okay with that and respond to me with warmth and kindness and compassion anyway. That's all. So how do I figure out whether potential Ts will be able to deal with that? If I ask it just like that, they might think I am a super difficult, needy client and not want to take it on.