Quote:
Originally Posted by shosjo
My wife of 20+ years was honest & loving. After I had some health issues, she had an affair about a year ago. She went to the Priest, counselors, etc to get advice whether to tell me & how to deal with her guilt. Last Summer she started continuing her cheating relationship & started loaning him money. The money issue became stressful enough that she started taking the crack cocaine instead of trying to break him of his addiction. After becoming addicted, she checked into a mental health hospital after attempting suicide. At the end of last year, she went to rehab for a month & stayed clean for another month then has started again, this time also trying Heroin. All along, she says she can't say no to the crackhead she has the relationship with. They rarely have sex even though she sleeps at his place 5 days/week. We have 2 kids still at home & she's a good mother so I don't want to divorce her for the kids sake. She says no to his initial requests for money (she has maxed out over $20,000 of credit cards and hands over her weekly paycheck) but then he starts begging & she gives in. She wants to die because she hates to give away the money. Is there a name for her condition other than maybe codependency or is there a way to stop the insanity?
Sincerely,
Desperado
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your question....
Quote:
Originally Posted by shosjo
Is there a name for her condition other than maybe codependency or is there a way to stop the insanity?
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Im sorry but we can not tell you what to do, how to stop the insanity as you call it. only her own treatment providers and your wife can tell you what she needs, you need, and your children need in order for things to get better...
all we do here is share our own problems, share whether we have the same problems as another member and share what our own treatment providers have us on for treatment options for our own problem....
another way to look at this is going online in groups like this, is just like if you had an alcohol problem or drug problem and you went to a support group where there are no doctors, therapists, everyone in the room is just like your self, struggling with that same problem or knows someone with the same problems. no one in the room tries to treat each others problems, just share a bit of what they are going through. for diagnosing and professional advice on how to treat and get through the problem well thats where doctors, therapists and psychiatrists come in.
my suggestion is you have some options...
if things get out of control you can take the steps to have her hospitalized again either voluntarily or involuntarily.
if things get to be too much for you to handle you can take the self care move of seeing a mental health treatment provider that can teach you the tools you may need in order to help yourself feel better and handle the stress, emotions...what ever that comes from being the spouse of a possibly mentally ill person..
or you can separate from your wife if thats what ....you ....feel is best for your children and you...
the options are endless depending upon your own off line situation, location, off line resources.....