I realized last night while laying in bed staring at the ceiling that I spend an absurd amount of time 'living in my head'. Replaying past events as far back as young childhood and wishing I had done this or that differently. Wondering how things would be now if only I'd made more of an effort to stand up for myself. Regretting giving into pressures of how I 'should' be. It's like my mind is stuck in the past; desperately trying to find a 'redo' switch. Even when new events occur I'm immediately stuck in the loop of 'Why didn't I say/do *this* instead??'. It's like a movie playing in my mind. I can SEE it as though I'm watching a movie and the emotions are overwhelming at times. Sometimes, I'm so stuck in that place that others will have to repeat something a few times or physically touch me before I even notice they've said anything at all. Even then, I don't stay in the present for long before my mind cycles back. It's like I just got through the days on auto-pilot.
Does this happen to anyone else? Is there something more wrong with me than my diagnosis (severe depression, general anxiety disorder, PTSD)? Is there some way to get out of the past and into the present?