It took me five years to get over losing my first t. I remember all the sadness, the wondering about her and our relationship and questioning every session we ever had, mulling so many things over in my mind. It hurt a lot. And i had this ache for her in my heart. I am doing so much better now though- the last year or so, i only think of her once in a while, and the pain can be there sometimes. But it has gotten much less. I really hope it gets better for you too.