I understand that guilt feeling very well. I feel that way with my three kids also. My girls dad has never been in their lives and my son's dad didn't take an interest in him until he was 18 years old. He's 22 now. I've had to have these serious talks with my kids before too. Just because I have "mental issues" doesn't give them a right to mistreat me. I don't deserve to be punished for my mental issues that are not my fault. I've straight up told all three of my kids that if they are going to live with me they will respect me. If not then they'll have to get their own place. My girls are 18 and 19. Both graduate this May and will go on to college. My son is 22. He graduated three years ago. He works and attends a local college. That's one of my rules, if you live in my house then you either work or attend college. You cannot live here if you're not doing one or the other. I know I haven't always been the best mother due to my mental issues but it is my job to see that my kids respect me and become independent adults. And I deserve respect from them no matter what.