Oh Liz~ I really feel your pain (pun intended) in this. Even my H is reluctant to ask the simplest 'how are you?' because I bit his head off (he wasn't using it anyway...just sayin') but you get what I mean, not helpful to turn on someone who is "just trying to be be helpful."

I think you are right in your most recent post on this.

I have a friend who is from a different culture who asks me, omg, beyond too many times how I am, if I tried xyz, yikes!

I now have learned to say little, pause, smile at her, say nothing, and then she just answers her own question. "Oh, still have headache. I'm so sorry."

It seems to work for me.

Actually, you can answer one for me. I have a "friend" who tells me to my face, (or on the phone) that my pain is psychosomatic, that I am carrying too much stress and therefore, if I would just stop being stressed by this pain I would be all better.
Yep, what a jerk. That's what I thought too....
Just need a new snappy comeback.
to you Liz