What's funny is that I actually said a similar saying in chat the other night: Someone who is nice to you but mean to a waiter is not a nice person. I've actually never heard it specifically geared toward a particular gender- or I did and forgot? Either is possible.

People are capable or being really cruel and heartless or really kind and loving. It spans all genders, all walks of life, all demographics. You have to seek out the good ones- it certainly isn't easy.

I think now superficial behavior and little investment in relationships is rewarded initially very quickly. the greater reward takes time and care and few people have the patience for that, in my experience.

I have no solutions, but I can relate to these feelings of frustration.