Thanks Skybark, my mom does receive widow social security benefits which is a super small amount..dad was self employed and probably didn't pay in much over the years, but she will not qualify for other benefits until she reaches 65. Assisting my mom monetarily doesn't bother me too much, I do wish she would have enough to have her own place, but she's not ready for that yet. I am trying to keep better boundaries with mom and our personal business, but it is a daily struggle. My husband and I have started walking for an hour four nights a week so we can talk in private then and that has helped much (at first there was guilt with not taking mom, because she and I used to walk together when she lived at my grandma's).