Hi Frances
Thanks for your insights. It's starting to come together for me. I do recall your post re: the breakup. I also remember that you had set up a few dates with others. I'm sorry it didn't work out for you. You really sound like a special and intelligent lady. I hope you find your mate.
Is being single so awful? I feel like such an idiot asking these questions. I'm fearful of sounding like the high master or something. That's not my intent. But is being with an abuser preferable to being single? I've been single now (I lost track) 3 or 4 years. I miss companionship. I wish I had a best friend. I miss sex. But I don't miss arguing, tears, frustrations of not being understood. I would rather be lonely than tormented and stressed out. Somehow I feel you have grown from it too. You certainly sound clear-headed and optimistic. You have so many helpful things to say. I know my opinion may not be welcome, but I think you're grabbing the snake by the tail in getting back together with your ex.
I know it's hard to find a perfect match. There probably is no such thing. I can see how survivng the trials bring two closer together. I can see how the give and take works to make a couple stronger. I would love to see you happy. You're no fool, I know. I just don't want to see you hurt. Please take care, ok?

"This too shall pass...."