Thanks for the replies. I am so glad you both took the time to share with me.I do feel honored that my husband still finds me attractive after all these years.And I still get all goofy for him too.I know lots of folks would love to have the relationship we have.But it has its ups and downs sometimes way up, sometimes way down.But we both agreed at the beginning of our relationship that we would always be there for each other.And we have.I think he is having a real hard time accepting the fact that we're not youngsters anymore.I mean, really at 47 you're not the same as you were at 17.It just doesn't work that way.i know I shouldn't just go along with him everytime he's ready and I'm not.It really does do something to your mind when you do that.He has never acted like he would go elsewhere if I said no, he just thinks that a "fine" woman like me ought to want it as much as he does.It used to be more mutual. But he never is not ready so it's always me that feels that way.I try to tell him to ease up on the pursuit so I can quit trying to get away.The best thing is we do have real talks about this.And we usually agree we both want the same things, to have good loving on a regular basis. I told him I wouldn't be just accommodating him anymore.I told him his manhood has got to stop trying to control him.He had better let that part know who's in charge and stop getting him in trouble. Just because it stands at attention doesn't mean it's going to get it everytime.I think he got the point I was trying to make.We have had a very nice afternoon and evening and I think we worked through some of our issues. I'm sure we'll have more to work on but at the minute we're as good as we could get.I am sure me coming here and unloading helped ease my mind.And for that I am eternity grateful. I will remember to do more of this sharing in the future to help keep myself sane.People I meet are always telling how nice and kind I am and with me being so shy, I don't see what people see in me that makes them like me so easily. I keep to myself and don't approach people at all but then complete strangers come up and talk to me like they know me.I can't figure that out. Anyway, thanks for the space to vent and share.My self esteem has went up considerably since coming here today.I feel like I will enjoy tomorrow. And hopefully that will continue until I get back to my happy-go-lucky self.Thanks, again, good folks.