Hi. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time. I have SI hitting issues also. Mine are explosive, meaning I have them during mixed episodes usually, with my bipolar. I don't know anything about being catatonic, but I really hope you can find something to help you.

You don't deserve to be beaten and you do deserve mercy. You don't deserve to be abused. I'm sorry someone is abusing you. They are the ones who are wrong, not you.