im not in the same situation but can understand why you are acting the way you are...i act the same way and it is really hard to control it. my fiance has ptsd really bad from being in iraq and it makes it really hard for us to communicate and work things out because we are both having alot of problems. i just try and remember that i love him and i want to be with him no matter what and he understands why i am the way i am. sorry i cant help you more...hope things get better for you