"I told a different friend i was going to cut and he didn't even try to stop me" - sounds very much like a cry for help. I generally have alarm bells ringing, if anyone just outright tells me what they're going to do. Aside from my personally thinking it's a very unfair thing to say, ... I'd rather know when someone was FEELING as though they wanted to do it, rather than just saying they're going to do it, ... it seems to serve no purpose other than making the other person feel like crap, ... sorry, I'm sure you don't want to know that, but that's kinda how it works, especially online. If it's any consolation, I did the very same thing, and I hate that I did it; it was unfair to others, but I've learned a lot from it, mostly from being on the other side of the fence.

Back in the day, I started and stopped a good few times; it can happen, but don't let that drag you down - you stopped once, you can do it again. Can't speak for years, though, ... about 4 years free, myself. :| There's more to it than just a number, ... every day not doing THAT is good for you. Do you have a therapist or someone else that can help, professionally? Would be worth getting all the help you can.