For the longest time no one but my family knew I was Bipolar. I still don't tell the world, but I have opened up close friends. I had a friend for 3 years and back in December I finally told him..not long after we stopped talking over something petty. 3 months later never heard from him again and I know it was because I told him I'm BP. Now I don't know who can handle knowing without judging me.

As someone else mentioned I find it difficult that I can be stable for months, sometimes years and then Boom I hit rock bottom. I can handle my manic states because I'm happiest then, I don't get full of rage or make really dumb decisions. When I think I've learned and gotten better control of this damn illness, it goes and kicks me in the butt reminding me I'm not as strong as I think I am.

I find the worse also that it's a daily battle with Myself! My thoughts get me in trouble, from getting fully depressed to having racing thoughts that don't let me sleep. If I was "normal" I know I would still be my own worse critic, but it's worse when you're BP.