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I think you should really tell your PDoc/ T. It sounds like there are probably some underlying issues that you need to work on. Try to hang in there and remember that you shouldn't be trying to fight this on your own.
Good luck
((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
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