Oh, honey. It's painful to read your words. I don't even think I want to imagine how you must feel experiencing this day in and day out.

This probably isn't very helpful... but I think it's significant that you care enough to still say good-bye (even in your head) to the people and things that you care so much about.

Maybe... if you can focus on WHY you are choosing those specific people/things to say good-bye to... pinpoint the things you will miss... try remember why you cherish and hold them close to heart... you can distract your brian on the good until you get through this dark time.

...well, that suggestion sounds lame even to me. I just want to be helpful, because you have helped me SO MUCH!!

You've made a difference in my world for the better.... that doesn't happen often. You are important and deserving. Please, hang in there. We all care about you, and don't want to say good-bye.