I am kinda stuck. I actually have been really stuck in a rut for years, and done many self-help activities in that time to get out but the momentum has only been temporary. At first I thought it was grief as I lost my mate...then I thought I was depressed. I would pile on obligations, and classes and self-help stuff to climb out. These worked for a while, but no real ongoing turn-around. The past two months I have been shedding as much stuff as I can.
First some very draining relationships got either ditched, or revamped with clear boundaries. Then I started throwing out or donating material possessions that have been boxed for years and useless to me (still doing that). A lot of weight seemed to lift from me. School, which I have been totally unable to do because of all the other stresses was the next to go. This was really weighing on me, as I have been dragging classes out for about 5 years. Still have 5 classes to go before getting my AS. I am flat exhausted mentally from it and need to rethink the direction with that as several classes (6) did not transfer over (moved from Calif. to east coast).
All I have left now is work (3 days a week and want to add one more day), care giving my sister, the garden with my dad (huge project every year), and finishing off house repairs. None of these goals are really new, but I want to approach them anew. Yet, I am still feeling very overwhelmed. How do I start different? Do I need therapy? I do attend a grief group still (by-weekly), but that too is losing effectiveness. Sometimes I just want to walk away from it all.