I had to log on to answer you.....

I'm sorry things are tough right now....you sound really sad and frustrated, but clearly love your husband.

My advice is that you show him this thread. It says beautifully how you feel and how understandably scared you are right now.
Nobody can explain how you feel better than you can, and I think that asking your husband to work with you as a team will only strengthen your relationship.

Hugs.