I called my boss today and told her the reason why I've been so unreliable and performing so poorly lately is because of bipolar. She was suprisingly sympathetic and told me to please keep her informed and that I wouldn't lose my job. I was so grateful that she understood.

I am thinking about going inpatient for a while. I just don't know what I'm going to do about maintaining my household while I'm gone. I live alone and have animals. With insurance do they expect you to pay the deductible up front? I can't afford to pay my bills, much less pay for this. I feel stuck, and have for months now. It's just getting worse and worse, because before I was just down about it, now I feel paralyzed.

Vacuumed the house and took a shower today. That's positive!