Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006
You say you let him walk out of your life as if it was his doing and then toward the end you state he pleaded for you. Are you saying you drove him out of your life or did he actually walk away? I ask because the way you state it says two different things. If he walked away, it's not on you but if you drove him away and he just complied to your wishes, then I guess you can say you did that.
Either way, when you know you love someone IMO it will endure all the difficutlies. questioning your disorder and whether that is keeping you from loving him is just faulty thinking IMO.
|
I drove him away. I was honest about my feelings. I feel like if u truly love someone, u wouldn't question ur feelings for them. U wouldn't be annoyed with them constantly when they're just trying to be nice and loving and to get affection from u. I guess he was just too much for me. (I.e. Tomorow was our 9mo and he wanted to do something special with me and had something planned. I had to switch my schedule and take the day off and work a double the following day to make up for the hours. Instead of being happy that he wanted to celebrate and do something nice, I was so annoyed that I had to work a double and be back to work for an 8hr shift 5hrs after I got out of the double) I guess I feel like I love him but am not IN love with him and thats not fair to him. He deserves to be loved how he loved me. And I just couldn't do that for some reason
I need to do alot of work on myself. I feel like I'm so wrapped up in this disorder and trying to analyze things that it keeps me from being happy. My mind gets flooded with doubts all the time. Which probably stems from low self-esteem. Im just not happy with myself.
Sent from my SPH-L710 using Tapatalk