Your parents would definitely be devastated if you killed yourself. They would never get over it and the way youre feeling right now is what they would have to feel everyday for the rest of their lives. Is that what you want for them? I think that youre talking to people on this site means you want to get help, but much as we care and will all do our best for you, what you need is to talk to someone in the real world. Maybe you could start by showing someone this thread.
Remember you are not alone and we care very much.