My husband and I have three children. Our oldest were from a previous marriage and the youngest is ours together. We actually met online when we were married. I know, that's awful. No excuse but I was in a abusive relationship and I just wanted someone to love me. My husband at the time ended up trying to kill me and killed himself instead and my now husband s wife died from a disease. It would seem our destiny's were aligned. That was until I discovered his adiction to Craigslist. I was so devastated the first time I discovered it. He really was my hero in many ways and I held him on this pedastestal. I was crushed. Its happened over and over again...the cycle of me discovering and him denying and then feeling betrayed and not good enough. Its been mostly men but women too. I also discovered his anger issues especially with alcohol. He's very charismatic and talks to everyone. He enjoys being the center of attention.

I love him but he won't stop and I feel so stuck. My own father told me that **** happens. My father has been my idol and last year when I was at my worst he told me about his marital problems and that he'd found someone else on the side. This was after asking him for advice. I have no one to talk to and I'm honestly feeling like all is lost. My own issues are getting worse and I just feel like I haven't really lived in years. I don't even think anyone cares honestly. I'm just so tired of feeling like this and I need some real advice.