Quote:
Originally Posted by HazelGirl
This sounds like you're punishing yourself for enjoying having T in your life, or you're working out of a fear-based approach to your therapy. Both are toxic and will hurt you. Why can't you bring up the fact that you feel like you contact him too much outside of sessions? It might help to have him reassure you and insist that what your feelings of attachment are normal.
|
HazelGirl has some wise words.
My T would call this a conflict-
You have natural relational needs for this person but perhaps because of what you learned and internalized as a child about relationships, you are conflicted about your actions.
An expression of the conflict could be thought of is that one trumps the other and you continually try to suppress the need as anyone in this situation might have done as a child when needing from your caregivers meant rejection, abandonment, or danger.
Some or all of this could be on an unconscious level. If this is the case, talking about both sides of the conflict makes the unconscious become conscious. After working through the associated feelings, eventually, your behavior naturally follows, where you can balance out the conflict and be ok with it.
Maybe this is not the case with you, but it is not uncommon.