I get what you mean because I don't even like saying/typing the word 'rape'. It always gives me a kick in the chest immediately after I do.

I think it just takes time for the reaction to wear itself down. When I first began speaking about the things that had happened to me, I was very uncomfortable, and it would affect me for days afterward. Now though, I can talk about it or hear others talking about similar cases without it causing that strong of reaction. What I think changed it was finally letting it out and realizing it wasn't anything I had to hide, and that it didn't matter if people knew. I had nothing to be ashamed or uncomfortable about with it. Those negative feelings belong to the ones who did those things.

That being said, I still experience that fight or flight response when it comes to physical proximity, so the above is only part of the equation...