I don't view this as abuse, or being a bad influence, or an un-supportive parent. Would anyone ever tell you (OP) that you're a bad parent for a physical disease? No! Because physical diseases are seen as involuntary, and thanks to the stigma, mental illness is seen as a voluntary choice. The truth is, you self harm, but you also get care when your self harm taxes your body. And a lot of us cannot say we do the same. Mentally, you are able to care for your children. Self harm has no bearing on your character or your ability to care for children. I self harm, and yet, I am a full time caregiver to my parents. I am in charge of my fathers medication (my mother is more abled then him, he just had a major open heart surgery and a coma), do the shopping, make the meals for my dad and mom that meets their dietary needs, help my mom with setting up my fathers dialysis, general cleaning, etc, And I know for a fact that I do an amazing job. This can be true for you as well.

Your mental illness is not an indication of character or ability to care for your children.

You are not abusing them in any way, you're also not neglecting them. Self harm involves the self, not others to aid in coping.

I hope everything ends properly and I do hope no one buys into the ridiculous stigma or standards people place on mentally ill people.