...but then it ended. Spent all day resisting my OCD ruminations, trying not to think the repetitive thoughts, telling myself I wasnt going to do it, then later tonight, it just broke through. I found myself starting the process, and eventually, I couldn't stop. It was like, if I didnt finish it, I wouldnt be able to find the answer I was looking for, or I wouldnt get the answer I want. I would not feel right until I completed the rumination ritual.

It's so hard, wanting to quit, but fearing if I do, I won't feel right, among other things. The worst part is after I have started the ruminations, and trying to quit in the middle without finishing them. Anxiety sets in and I start feeling like if I dont finish, my fears are true, or I won't be able to use my mind like I want, to solve problems and work through situations at work.

I know they say the key to breaking the OCD rituals is to resist them. I've read that some psych sites even suggest intentionally getting yourself into a thought process, then forcing yourself to stop and not go through with it. Is this adventageous or does it just lead to more problems? Would it be better to finish these thought processes or stop?

It's an overwhelming feeling because I fear if I do stop, i'll never find the answer I am looking for!

Arrrrgh!

I have thought about hypnotherapy as a means to try to figure this all out. Has anyone been through this and does it really help? Ive often wondered if I go see a hypnotherapist, they might be able to block these unwanted thoughts, or at least take me back to when they first started and block that thought, thus causing a chain reaction and making me forget about the rest of it. At the very least, they might be able to probe in and through the subconcious, help me answer the question that ive been seeking for so long to answer.