what I wish for most right now is for my head to be calm ,stay calm, see my T and tell her that my thoughts are out of control big time and for her to not be angry at me about it and to help me get control of them again. not be angry because I allowed myself to be treated like this from my father . really I have no idea how not to when I am in the middle of the situation. I know she wants me to be that person . I am so tired of disappointing people.