I know I'm only nineteen (just turned nineteen in fact) and I know I have time...but I don't know how much longer I can live like this. I've just watched some really important relationships (mentor figure, T) blow up in my face and now they're on life support and it just hurts so much. I can't keep going through this. This thing with mentor figure was just awful. I hurt her a lot without meaning to, and I made her change...and now it's just fragmented and it's my fault and I need to stop doing this to myself. And to others.